This is a weird feeling, because I have longed to tell my story to someone for years and haven’t been able too. I have been scared and afraid to speak out and tell everyone who I am.. in a way. It’s strange now, because after reading some of the stories here I have gained some confidence to tell mine.

As I read another letter I laughed because I am also sitting here in the cyber lounge at my college and looking over both my sides and seeing if someone was looking at the pages, while i search about the Dream Act, or if they were reading this letter. However, that letter inspired me and to tell my story.  I have kept all this bottled up inside.

It angers  me all these senators that are saying “NO” to the Act, it is not fair for us undocumented bright people. I came to this country when I was 6 years old. I have lived in New York my whole life with my mom and my dad and my two brothers. Growing up, I thought we were just like any other family in the neighborhood. I played outside with all my peers from school and neighborhood friends. Nothing  at that age sparked my mind, that there was something different about my family. Not until, my older brothers graduated from high school, them at 17 years old and I at 11 years old; I realized that my brothers and I couldn’t do most of the things that our friends could.

We could not fly back to Ecuador, where we were born and visit our grandmother, or even just go on vacation just because. After my brother’s high school graduation, I at the age of 11 being a child, I understood what struggle was when I should have been without a care in the world, having fun outside playing with other kids.

I realized that my life couldn’t be like the other kids. I saw my brothers struggle. They attended college and at the side had two jobs in order to pay tuition. They had jobs that started at 4 in the morning delivering newspaper in fancy areas of the city. Finishing that at about 8am and then heading to school, having just enough time to change and have breakfast before leaving to school. School for them was from 9am to 3pm and then heading to a second job at a restaurant. Both of them going to school full time and having two jobs was hard, I cried because there was nothing I could do to help them. They barely slept and still managed to get all A’s in school and graduated with their bachelors degree with a GPA of 3.5.

Now, I am in college and seeing my brothers struggle at a young age gave me strength and be like my brothers. I always listened to my mom when she said, study, go to school, that’s the only way that you can get ahead in life. In school all I heard through out elementary school was, “Education is the Key to Success”, well I listened to both and I did just that. I graduated with  honors in elementary school, with a scholarship to any private school of my choice. I graduated from middle school with one of the best averages there, I graduated from high school again with one of the best averages in school. When I got accepted to college, I was so excited knowing that all the hard work is paying off.

First, semester wasn’t so hard because my mom had savings and I was able to pay for school. However, as the years progressed, now in my senior year per suing my bachelors degree and I have struggled to pay for school. My mother’s savings have ranned out after 4 years of paying for my school. I have helped as well, having gotten some jobs here and there as a waitress, cashier, most  of them only temporary and low wage jobs since I have no papers. Now, I am looking for a job, I have one more semester to go and I have no money to pay for school. I have applied so many times and have been called for many interviews and all of them have hired at me after the interview, however, once they ask me for all my required papers, I am denied leaving me without no option but to say thank you and walk away. I have not being able to get an internship related to my career because they are government agencies unlike my peers at school, hence not giving me a chance to attain experience in the areas I need for future reference.

My other concern since sophomore year is the thought that I am about to graduate and what… where do I go from there..??? I am scare to graduate, and just have a paper in my hands stating that I have gained knowledge in a particular area and not being able to use it disappoints me. Every time I think about this, I start thinking about all these senators that are saying “NO”, and I think to myself, well I have been taught that education is the key to success in our education system but they failed to mention that education is only the key if you have your papers.

— I know many out there have the same issues as me, and I just want to say I feel anger and resentment to this country at this point, my country which I have grown in. I don’t know any country aside from this one and I consider my self an American no matter what a paper tells me. My country is denying me a chance at a better future and a better well being for my family and my future economy, and it just makes no sense….

Thank you, to whoever is reading my story. I just felt like I have taken off a big weight off my shoulders.

Sincerely,
Anonymous