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I Thought I Was A Citizen

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January 12, 2012

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Documents I have…
*British Birth Certificate
*Wedding License
*My Child’s Birth certificate.

My parents brought me to the states when I was 5 years old. My father was arrested and deported back to England for domestic violence when I was about 8 years old.

I grew up thinking I was an American citizen. When I was in highschool I was required to take a PET (Pre Employment Training) class, part of the class required my SSN. Being a child of only 17 almost 18, I had no idea what a SSN even WAS! I lived in a small town with no desire to learn how to drive yet or a reason too. Julia was working two jobs at the time the school was wanting this, so it was difficult to get in touch with her to sort this out. She had told me to tell the school BHS, that I don’t have one because I was born in England. I still remember the nonchalant manner she informed me of this. I didn’t think much of it at the time.

The school thought I was nuts! I didn’t understand why. I had no reason to question my mother. Well, as it turns out the school asked me to leave. I was suddenly “a liability for them” since I was turning 18 and soon to be considered an adult.

I left with the intention of getting my GED and moving on to collage. I had already picked my courses and planned my life out. Surprise! No SSN or government issued ID, no GED… no GED no collage.

Around this same time I had met Arthur. My first partner. I had moved in with him around the same time Julia moved to Virginia. He had tried to help me get my immigration adjustment started as well as setting up a drivers licence/photo ID. We knew so little back then. In fact we were just talking about that last week, haha. Catch 22′s and dead ends seemed to be everywhere from the very begging. Still I had my love and my pets that I wasn’t willing to give up, let alone my friends.

Needless to say, Arthur and I didn’t work out. 5 years into the relationship and we were ready to move on.

Then I met Justin, my husband. We planned on being in a long term relationship regardless. So we planed on getting an I-130. He came with me to file for it and we were told we should wait for the FOIA to show how I came into the states. I am still waiting for it.

My husband lost his mind and started abusing me when I got pregnant. I had no choice but to file a restraining order. When I told my immigration attorney what had happened and why I can’t pay for the fees anymore, I was dropped because when Justin came to one of my meetings it caused “a conflict of interest”.

Now I have a child, can’t work, can’t rent. I had to move in with a man I don’t even like. He is forcing me to be in a relationship with him since I can’t be I=independent, but it is clean and safe for my child. I am so unhappy and I keep reaching out. I am alone and help doesn’t exist. No one understands, worst of all yesterday I passed a newspaper USA Today. On the front page it stated, “now it will be even MORE difficult for illegal aliens to establish themselves”.

I would love to be independent and not HAVE to be with a man.

~L~

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Support The Alabama 4!

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January 11, 2012

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Dear Friend of Undocumented Youth,

On Wednesday January 11th four undocumented youth will be appearing in court at 9:00 am in Gadsen, Alabama. Sonia Guinansaca and Felipe Baeza from New York, Jesus Barrios from California, and Reyna Wences from Illinois will be facing a charge of criminal trespassing in the 3rd degree after being arrested while looking for a person in deportation proceedings at the Etowah County Detention Center. The four were in Alabama supporting a conference and action by the National Immigrant Youth Alliance (NIYA), which including doing anti-deportation advocacy with people in deportation in local detention facilities. After receiving a call from a detainee, the four were determined to find this person and organize around their case. Being in Alabama, they decided to go ask in person.

“When we went inside the office the person behind the desk could not find him. We kept looking and telling her that we felt a responsibility to find him and help him. But we could not find his name. After we asked to talk to the supervisor he called the police. We had a conversation with all of them about the local detention laws, as well as the anti-deportation work we do,” says Wences remembering the incident. After a few minutes the four were asked to exit the office, and they stepped out to the sidewalk. “The police officer then threatened us saying that if we said one more word he would arrest us. I asked, ‘What are we going to do?’ and he took out his handcuffs. I don’t remember them reading us our Miranda rights either,” she states. The four spent the following two and a half days in jail and were charged with criminal trespassing and disorderly conduct. On Wednesday, the four are going to a court in a small town in Alabama. The court has told them that for their charges, they will not be assigned a public defense attorney. Without any representation, the four undocumented youth organizers will walk into a court in a state that has passed the most aggressive legislation in the country that criminalizes undocumented workers. The maximum sentence, by Alabama criminal code, is three

The NYSYLC, Immigrant Youth Justice League and the National Immigrant Youth Alliance are asking for your help. As of right now, we need to secure the funds necessary to get Sonia, Reyna, Felipe and Jesus’ legal, court and other costs associated covered. Please contribute and help our movement, and to ensure that these four organizers are safe. Stand with us today. Click here to donate.

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Intersectionality: Illness and Immigration

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January 9, 2012

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In a neurologist’s office in April it finally all came together. I had been experiencing
symptoms of various illnesses for two years, ranging from vaguely annoying indigestion
and the occasional headache, to debilitating pain and the inability to swallow. After months
of consults, blood draws, medications and surgery, I still wasn’t well. In fact, I seemed to
be falling farther and farther into the valley of illness. My formerly healthy and energetic
self was wondering if I would ever graduate from college or maintain a job, let alone raise a
family.

With scans of my brain open on his desk, the doctor launched into a monologue on the
seminars and conferences he had recently attended, most of which were of little interest
to me. But when he mentioned the recent research showing that there is a link between
childhood trauma and adult onset chronic illness, I broke down. Right there, across the
desk from a less than personable doctor, I sobbed. As not only the months of illness, but the
years of pain flooded through me, the only thing I managed to say to him was “I know”.

In September, the Harvard Educational Review published results from a study that showed
the impact of immigration on the US born children of undocumented parents. I doubt
that it surprised any of us when they revealed that children of undocumented parents
experience “fear and vigilance” which leads to difficulties in educational, economic,
and developmental arenas. We know how our childhoods were crippled by fear in our
families from before we even knew what undocumented was. We know that it was hard
to concentrate in school when we were scared that our parents wouldn’t be there when
we got home. And some of us experienced one or both parents turn their own grief and
frustration onto us, as this system broke them.

Research has also shown a link between adult-onset chronic illness and childhood trauma.
In other words, our minds and our bodies are connected, and what we face as children
can lead to diseases that don’t present until adulthood. Taken together, these two areas
of research lead us to see how the immigration trauma that millions of children in this
country endure can literally break our bodies.

As with many people with chronic illness, I have good days and bad days. And on the
bad days, I need to understand why this happened to me, why I am sick. There are many
things that both modern medicine and I don’t know about my illnesses. However, I do see
how living in the shadow of a broken immigration system caused enough stress on my
childhood body that it couldn’t function normally, and forever changed my life path. Like
the immigration system itself, it’s not fair; it just plain sucks. But, like the undocumented
youth movement has taught us, we can fight the immigration system and we can fight
illness. It won’t be easy, but one day we’ll win. And in the mean time, on the bad days, we’ll
have each other.

Note: I am privileged to have had health insurance throughout my illness experience.
Without that and the access to care that goes with it, I can only imagine how much more

difficult everything would be. It is crucial that we include health care access when we
think about the rights and resources that immigrant communities need to have in order to
survive.

-Anonymous

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Unity In Oppression: Connecting Our Struggles

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January 6, 2012

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coming out publicly about ones immigration status is an empowering step for many undocumented individuals.

Why?

Because the simple act of stating something that society instructs to be kept hidden is an act of revolution.
Because once something we all have in common is stated out loud we create unity among people sharing the same struggle.
Because finding this unity or support system is important to those who feel alone.
Connecting our struggles and identities is where a movement is born.

I’ve come out of the shadows undocumented and unafraid for over 2 years now. On tv, the radio, news papers, blog posts and t-shirts. Two of the biggest events in which I stated my status were organized for the National Coming Out Day in March. One sunny morning in 2010 I stood in front of the Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) building right here in New York and stated that I am undocumented. In March 2011 I stood in the middle of a circle in Union Square and told all the onlookers. However, when writing and sharing my story of self I never told anyone that I was molested as a child by someone I know.

In high school we were asked to submit a personal statement along with our college applications…an essay about ourselves which described a struggle we faced that empowered us in a certain way. I didn’t embrace my undocumented identity as much back then so I decided to write about being molested and how it had changed me. This is something big and I cannot hide the fact that it happened; it has shaped who I am. I didn’t want to be secretive about it and I know that being quiet about something this huge doesn’t mean it makes it go away…so I wanted to embrace it. I wanted to share this huge fact about myself because I know I am not the only one. By writing my piece I had hoped to reach other girls who like me were once in the same situation. I wanted to get over this huge fear of intimacy. I had hoped that writing it out would mean I wouldn’t have nightmares anymore. However, one of my high school teachers told me to never tell anyone about what happened, “you should try to write about something that won’t be embarrassing to speak about when interviewed by college staff. This is not an appropriate topic” and just like that she convinced me to keep quiet about something that is intertwined with my sense of self.

Similarly, I read and hear about folks coming out as:
parent and undocumented
student and undocumented
working while undocumented
unemployed and undocumented
queer and undocumented

But I’ve never been able to say that I survived molestation and am also undocumented because I didn’t understand how both were connected. I didn’t understand how one issue balanced with the other. I didn’t understand that my inability to ask for help when the abuse was happening was intertwined with the threats I heard of having ICE called, of having my family separated. I didn’t understand that by sharing this story I could reach other individuals who may be living this every day and don’t ask for help because they think it isn’t there.

Why bring one topic as controversial as sexual molestation into the already controversial issue that is immigration?

I get it now.

Because one may not agree with my fight for immigrant rights, but by seeing another side to my story they’ll understand that I’m just as much of a human as anyone else.

Because I’ve stated my immigration status and I seem brave and courageous, even though another aspect of me is still scared and embarrassed.

Because to fully promote empowerment we must practice it.

Because we are all survivors of something and there is nothing to be quiet about.

Coming out isn’t just one identity. It is about finding strength and courage within all of our struggles. Coming out about any obstacle we have faced, and embracing it, is where we empower ourselves and aren’t ashamed about it anymore. Sure, talking about my immigration status is controversial enough as it is but folks needs to understand that this isn’t the only problem I am facing.

Yes, I am undocumented but that isn’t the only aspect about me that matters. And so, one of my resolutions for 2012 was to embrace all of me equally. I am not a 2D person, but 3D even 4D with different facades to my identity, different struggles, different stories that go untold because many believe that this is only a one issue movement. When it’s not. By connecting all of our stories, struggles and realizing that there is unity in oppression we are able to really move forward. Our existence is combined with many other things.

If you want to share your story on our website feel free to email Angy@nysylc.org or submit your story through this form.

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